There’s A Hole Where My Kraft Dinner Used To Be

August 25th, 2008 by Potato

There’s a hole in my cupboard between the Penne and the Zoodles, the demarcation between boxed and canned food where my Kraft Dinner used to be. It’s empty right now. That used to be a dire sign of a Kraft Dinner shortage, and somewhere in my house a klaxon and flashing orange light would go off signalling me to run off to the 24-hour grocery store to get more post haste.

Now, however, that hole will stay there, a sad gap toothed reminder that somehow they broke Kraft Dinner. I first noticed a few months ago, in the last box I had right before they changed to the new box artwork. The cheese was not right, and not in the way that it’s usually not right. It had a strange chemical taste to it… which is difficult to describe considering it was fake cheese and food colouring to begin with. Something has definitely changed though: the cheese is runnier and just not as tasty, and I haven’t been able to find anything I’ve been doing to cause that. So it’s their fault, whether it was a cost cutting measure in the face of rampant food price inflation, a change in suppliers, or just a damned mistake, it matters little now. Kraft Dinner is broken, and there is none in my cupboard.

For a while, at least, I will keep the hole there, an empty space preserved in memory of my most popular hot lunch. While I mourn. As time passes perhaps that spot will be filled by PC macaroni and white cheddar sauce, or maybe the general pasta supplies will spill over and fill it up. Perhaps I will try again in a few months, once the memory of what real Kraft Dinner tastes like fades (if such a thing is ever possible); perhaps I will grow to miss it so much that I buy a box just for show. Perhaps the Fast ‘n Fancy rice dishes can return to the bottom shelf from their exile above, reuniting with the other starchy foods in the midst of this tragedy. For now though, there’s a hole in my cupboard where my Kraft Dinner used to be.

And there’s a hole in my heart where my Kraft Dinner used to live :(

There\'s a hole in my cupboard where my Kraft Dinner used to be

7 Responses to “There’s A Hole Where My Kraft Dinner Used To Be”

  1. Netbug Says:

    From wikipedia…

    “In 2008, Kraft introduced “Original Kraft Dinner; Now with More Cheese” as a replacement for the “Original” KD. In fact, this product is nothing like the original, with an entirely new flavour.”


  2. Potato Says:

    They also screwed up the spirals :(

  3. moneygardener Says:

    This post is hilarious! Do you mind if a re-publish it on my blog?

  4. Potato Says:

    Go ahead MG :)

  5. moneygardener Says:

    Thanks, I really apreciate it :) It’s up on themoneygardener now.

  6. Potato Says:

    PC Mini-Chefs Cha-Cha Cheesy Macaroni & Cheese is looking to be a decent substitute. It doesn’t quite taste like the real thing, and certainly doesn’t look it — with no artificial colours, the cheese sauce isn’t neon orange, but instead a cream colour (very similar to the PC white cheddar macaroni and cheese). However, it merely tastes “slightly off-brand” — it still tastes like cheese (or powdered cheese-flavoured milk protein or whatever) with no hint of that chemical undertone that turned me off KD. Note however that the PC Mini-Chefs cheese sauce is thick. I ended up adding almost twice the recommended amount of milk to thin it out and it was still considerably thicker than the new altered KD (and that was made by holding back some of the milk & margarine).

  7. Potato Says:

    I’m now fully stocked on PC Deluxe White Cheddar.

    Om. Nom. Nom.